Note: '3' is pronounced like 'E.' Thus 'TH3Y' is the same as 'THEY' and 'TH3M' is the same as 'THEM.' Similarly '$' is the same as 'S,' making '$HE' the same as 'SHE' and the '@' is the same as 'A' so 'LUN@' would be 'LUNA.' I'm sorry about the awkwardness of this language, but crazy people don't always do the most rational things. Try being crazy sometime and you'll see that its very different. Things don't always work quite the way they are supposed to work.
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TH3Y watch me. TH3Y try to hide so me can't see TH3M watching me, but me knows TH3Y are there. How does me know? $HE told me. $HE is always there as well, watching, whispering in me ear, letting me know what TH3Y are doing.
$HE is beautiful. $HE is so serene, pretty, calming, and bright. Me sees H3R floating in the sky at night, looking down on me, and smiling. $HE is always in me thoughts and me can always hear H3R voice, telling me what TH3Y are doing.
TH3Y want me dead. $HE told me so. Me has to kill TH3M before TH3Y kill me. Me only problem is that me does not know what TH3Y look like and $HE won't tell me. Me is not sure who to kill to protect me-self.
$HE loves me. MI$$ LUN@ *L*O*V*E*S* me. $HE told me $HE loves me. $HE whispered it. Me knows me can trust H3R.
Me got a gun. Me knows how to use me gun. Me will use it to protect me-self. $HE told me to. Me always listens to H3R. Me had noodles for lunch. Me keeps me gun with me all the time in case $HE tells me that me needs to shoot one of TH3M.
Me used to take drugs. They made H3R go away and stopped me hearing H3R voice. Me didn't like that so me stopped taking the drugs. Me feels better now. The drugs made me world all messed up. Me was supposed to go to school and do dumb things with 'friends.' Maybe TH3Y pretended to be me friends and me wasn't safe. That would have been bad. Very very bad.
Me doesn't like noodles but me ate them because $HE said me needs to eat. Me cleaned me gun while me ate. $HE makes me keep me gun clean. $HE makes me do lots of things. Me burned me-self. Me used boiling water to put the blisters and scars all over me. $HE said that was the best way. The pain made me alive. Me is supposed to hurt all the time. $HE said so. $HE says TH3Y will get me if me stops hurting. Me promised H3R me will always hurt.
Me is going to go to the zoo. $HE said the animals need to be let out. $HE says TH3Y will be there so me must take me gun. Me will do this because that is what $HE wants. Me loves H3R. Me loves LUN@.
Me thinks that the bear looks like one of TH3M. Me asks H3R. $HE says "maybe." Me will shoot it just to be safe. !BANG! Me wonders why the others want to cuddle one of these in bed. Me thinks it looks kind of dumb, all bent and bloody like that. It was probably one of TH3M. It like probably ate noodles.
Me wants to be hugged. $HE says the Gori11a will do it. $HE says me needs a Gori11a hug. $HE says the Gori11a is not one of TH3M. Me has to shoot the zoo worker person to get in the cage with the Gori11a. Me thinks the worker was one of TH3M for trying to stop me going to get me hug.
$HE says to run! The Gori11a was only fooling me. Gori11a smells icky. Gori11a must be bad. Me runs and runs and runs and runs ... Me runs until me can't run any more. Me wonders how far me ran. It is dark and $HE is there. Me wonders where me is now. $HE won't tell me. $HE says they are everywhere. Me wants some noodles now. Me vomits in the snow. $HE didn't tell me about the snow. TH3Y must have put it there. Me is in TH31R place. Me is doomed. Me gun doesn't seem so good now.
Help me LUN@? Pleeeeeeeeeese?
"Close your eyes, little one. Go to sleep. It will be all right." Me remembers once hearing a voice like that. It was a nice voice coming from a nice person. Me wonders what happened to that person. Maybe TH3Y got her. Yes, it was a "her." Me thinks her name was Michelle.
"$TOP! Do not think about her. She is gone. Think only of ME! Think of your LUN@. I will protect you now. She left you. She died. You have only me now. TH3Y are coming."
Me obeys. LUN@ knows what is best for me. Me must get ready for TH3M. Hmmmmmm. It's so hard to think. Me wishes me had some noodles. Me doesn't like noodles but me wants some. Me sees a door. Me goes in. There is some screaming but me makes it go away with me gun. Me finds some Kraft Dinner in a cupboard and starts to make it. Me remembers Michelle making me Kraft Dinner. "Here little one. I'm sorry it's all I can afford. When I get the child support, I'll take you to MacDonalds." Me never went to MacDonalds. Michelle died and didn't take me. Now me remembers. Bob killed Michelle. Bob was one of TH3M for sure.
The Kraft Dinner is good. Me hears sirens. TH3Y are coming. $HE said the sirens are from TH3M. Me has me gun ready. Me sits quietly and enjoys me noodles. This time they are good. Me likes the warm gooeyness of the cheese. Me hears TH3M banging at the door. Me shoots the one that comes through the door first. Me won't let TH3M take me noodles.
It hurts. Me has a hole in me. LUN@ will be happy because me hurts. Me can feel red stuff coming out of me hole. TH3Y had guns too. TH3Y put a hole in me. Me is tired. Me thinks me will lie down and have a little nap. Me can hear H3R whispering to me. $HE sounds like Michelle. "Close your eyes, little one. Go to sleep. It will be all right."
"Nighty night, mommy. Ooops, me means LUN@. Why do you both sound the same?"
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SMITH, Sasha Jean - Aged 19. Passed away due to complications from mental illness. Predeceased by mother, Michelle Alexis Smith, nee Jarvis (1980 - 2005)and survived by father, Robert (Bob) James Smith. No siblings. Cremation by the state in private. No formal services. Donations may be made the Society for Schizophrenia Research in lieu of flowers.
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